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  1. Sick ( You have been warned)

    Jokes & funny stuff
  2. My Clio is sick - Clio whizz kids I'm calling you!

    Hello Experts! My Clio 1.2 16v 2002 is sick! It has an oil leakage somewhere around Rocker Cover but I have no clue where it comes from! :| What is going on? Oil leak from top of the engine Occasional misfiring Massive oil leak the day after oil change My clues: I excluded head gasket...
  3. Rude and Offence,,, but funny in a sick way

    Jokes & funny stuff
    "Mrs Hefner, it's the funeral parlour. Your husband's permanent erection means we can't get the coffin lid shut!" "Oh don't you worry about that," she said, " I'll be right over to sort it out." "But what do you intend to do?" asked the undertaker. "Cut it off, spit on it, shove it up his...
  4. sick you have been warned

    Jokes & funny stuff
    "You sure do have a sick mind," the doctor said to me. "Yeah, I know, " I chuckled, "I get that a lot." "No," he said, "I mean you have an inoperable brain tumour. You have weeks to live."
  5. Sick

    Jokes & funny stuff
    As I slipped my finger slowly inside her hole. I could immediately feel it getting wetter and wetter. I took my finger back out and within seconds she was going down on me. "I really need a new :censored: boat," I thought to myself.
  6. Sick Grand Espace in Scotland

    Our 2004 2.2 dci Grand Espace is very sick, having only done 56k. We've gone from needing oil top-ups too regularly, and a smokey first start every day, to the situation now where it blew the oil seal beside the timing belt, and is constantly ****ing oil from a breather tube. My mechanics have...
  7. Sick of my Renault van

    General Chat
    I've had 110 car since driving and this must be the worse thing I've ever owned Since buying it the heaters only work when I'm on the motorway and within a month I've had two water pumps go on the van I took the heater matrix out yesterday because I thought that was blocked but that turned out...
  8. Hi from a sick Trafic

    Welcome to RenaultForums
    Sadly I am not a Renault fan, but have joined to learn about dealing with the many problems I have had with my Renault Trafic lwb. 2.4. 5 door. We bought it new in 2003 and whilst we like the size and drive, the reliability has been shocking. I am now investigating the loss of...
  9. Renault scenic 2004 worried sick

    Hi guys new to this site have a prob that my cooling fan is permantly on whilst driving temp gauge is ok this happened some time ago and a guy put a meter on a fixing in the car by the below the gearstick he got a reading then reset it by means of the levers push buttons behind the steering...
  10. Chinese sick leave : 'i no come work today!!!'

    Jokes & funny stuff
    Hung Chow calls into work and says, 'Hey, I no come work today, I really sick. Got headache, stomach ache and legs hurt, I no come work.' The boss says, 'You know something, Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel sick like you do, I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That...
  11. Valsecchi steps in for sick Raikkonen in Spain

    Formula 1 news's Kimi Raikkonen will not be testing as scheduled in Barcelona on Saturday after coming down with suspected food poisoning overnight. The team's third driver, Davide Valsecchi, will take over for the morning session. Raikkonen's team...
  12. clio 1.2 16v running sick :(

    Hi, i'm having trouble with my clio, engine is running uneven at low revs (clears if you rev it) it then cuts out and puts a orange light on the dash (looks like a heater plug light) car will re start everytime then after approx 20 secs will stop. I have replaced MAP sensor, TDC sensor, stripped...
  13. sick traffic dci 115.

    Hi all. Its starts and runs up untill 2500rpm then starts to splutter. Had it checked at the garrage and found no faults listed. Had fuel filter changed but still the same, Any ideas.
  14. renault scenic diesel sick help me

    hi there i have a renault scenic 1998 turbo diesel its been my dayly 4 ages and its been great until today all of a sudden it reved up now when u start it it revs at 3 tho when its warm the orange engine warning light comes on and its like its stuk in limp home mode it wont go over 15 mph
  15. Anyone sick of their DPF? Read this...

    Hi all, I was reading my latest (Sept 2011) issue of CAR magazine, when I found a very interesting feature on DPF's and how they have become an industry-wide problem. There is a company featured which can remove/disable the system (which isn't needed for MOT purposes), and their website is...
  16. pass the sick bucket

    General Chat
    deX7R9RbmX0&feature=fvwrel :eek::eek:
  17. sick scenic

    Hi Guys...... Hopefully somebody will be able to advise. My mk1 scenic (99 S) 1.6i 8 valve...K7M720, has a problem which has started quite suddenly , as of tuesday it has been a little harder to start than usual. The engine has been turning over for a longer period of time until it does fire...
  18. Sick Clio Blower

    Hi there...I'm new and in need of assistance My 2003 Clio blower has just stopped working on settings 1,2 and 3 so only working on highest setting 4. My car has climate control I will be very grateful if someone could advise me of likely cause and corrective action? Many Thanks
  19. newbie here with sick laguna 1.9dci

    Hi new here and looking for some help i have a 2002 1.9 dci laguna only just bought it and very very cheap have noticed that its seems to be hard to start it from cold or hot,is worse when its hot when its running its spot on drives like new! i have noticed that once i insert the key...
  20. I feel so sick....

    General Chat
    Ugh! This just turns my stomach thinking about it. The Saudis are going to regulate child brides (not ban them) Their version of modernity is to ban the man, who might be really old, from doing sex with her until she gets to puberty. Thats OK then ..he might have to wait till she is 11 or so...